Rising & Defeating the Bully/Bullies
We all had once in our lives, been victims of bullies, and it’s unfair and unjust for us to get bullied. There are some questions that we’ll generally tend to ask ourselves, “Do we ask to get bullied?” “Do we’ve a label on our forehead to pick on us at all times?” “Is there a few labels on our forehead that we’re unaware of?”
There are many ignorant people out there that lack empathy. It really amazes and surprises me why they think it’ll be okay to pick on someone that’s different? Why do many of these ignorant folks choose to think and act this way toward others? Do they’ve anything better for them to do or say?
To me bullying is like a form of a “Hate speech” towards others and this “Hate speech” declaring to others that they’re better and smarter than them. Some people tend to think that they’ve got the power and control over everything in their lives. The question is that, is their behaviour tolerated and accepted by me or others around me? There are many different forms and types of bullying out there today than ever before. There are many different attack strategies that are used to bully others. However, there’s no end in sight apparently to these attack strategies, yet it needs to be stopped.
Bullies, to me, are cowards, and are insecure about themselves, as well as being jealous of others and think that it’s okay to bully them, especially if others around them are different. I found that I was being bullied because I was different. I feel that those that bully mayn’t have anything in their lives, and nothing to stand on. Yet, they’re losing everything in their grasp and sight. To what they’re losing; their grasp and sight would be as I said before, power and control over everything in their lives.
I’m writing as a voice to be heard and speaking from the heart, as well as seeking out a change in everything happening in our society. No matter what it is, we should be focusing on making a difference and change. Again, back to the question at hand, should this behaviour and actions towards me be accepted and tolerated? No way! I didn’t give you permission to bully me. I didn’t give you permission to label me! We all need to develop a thick skin, to be strong in ourselves.
Today, the truth and reality is that many people get away with too much and want to have power and control over everything.
The truth of it all is based on FEAR. People that fear the power of control are the ones that are avoiding love and empathy. The truth and reality here is that, fear is so strong that anyone that has it, it’ll be crippled by it. Despite that, many of us will hide away their actual feelings and emotions. We need to realize that people will attack us; no matter what their reasons behind it all. We need to ignore them and remove the fuel in the fire. I would look into the bullies’ eyes and remain calm to ask them the questions like, “What’s your problem and why are you bullying me?” If that doesn’t work, I would walk away as it takes more courage to walk away than to fight someone. I’ll look them in the eyes and think and say to me; “Enough is enough. I’m not going to accept anything like this from you anymore.” “I’m going to start loving myself more, as am worth more than this bully or bullies that are bullying me.” Also, to love others around me that deserves my love and attention. Love is a stronger force to hate and that love has power, and can conquer all things.
People on the Autism Spectrum however, will always be a threat to others being different to them. They are threats to people, because Autistics are loving and empathetic towards others around them that’ll come to them into their social circle as friends or enemies. What’s achieved in life is attaining love and power. We love ourselves to know the differences in every situation that we face and that, many of us that walk in the power of love will also be walking in truth. Knowing this as well as walking in our shoes based on our everyday experiences, is all that matters and should matter to this day. We are a threat to these bullies, and they’ll lose their battle and fight of power and control. I believe however, that the truth will prevail and stand out in the best and test of time.
Bullies will mirror themselves into you, and in reality they’re blind to see what they’re doing and saying to us is wrong. Even though they may know, they just in some ways deny it all. We need to remember that, they’re the problem not us. At that time, I kept on thinking to myself what was wrong with me, if I say something or did something wrong?
I’ve been accustomed to being bullied and threatened to a point of thinking that it was the norm to accept this sort of behaviour. I couldn’t accept it anymore, and I decided to make a stand and tell my story. I kept on hiding and lying to myself that it was okay, when in reality it wasn’t, and it was affecting everything around me and about me. I believe however that, bullies tend to prey most on the weakest and most vulnerable of their preys. I believe also, that genuine self-love and confidence can be used to help others like me. We know what’s true for us. Bullies will and can tend to bully us about our pasts. Yet, the past is not who and what we are, as the past can’t define us. It just teaches us what’s come in life and to learn from the past mistakes and more. I however, now have chosen not to be a victim, as I choose to become a victor and I’m healing slowly. My old wounds and scars sometimes do show, despite me putting on a brave face and more. I want to be a voice that’ll be heard and not just ignored. Those who allow themselves to become victims of bullying do tend to go on a path of self-harm, self-destruction, addictions and more. I pray and hope that what I’m writing will help the readers know more about me and more importantly be able to see what life’s like, for an Aspie. I would like to teach people about self-love and to embrace each other’s differences. Again as I said or wrote before, that this is all about a “Hate speech” that bullies do, and despite me drowning in all the questions and blinded to what was going on, I believe that I’m beautiful, courageous and strong. What I went through is real, and that was my reality. I decided to change and make a difference.
We need to make a stand today that enough is enough, and not to let the bullies that come in our lives to take and ruin everything. I believe that I can make a difference and a stand, the bullies. And I believe also wholeheartedly that I can and will achieve everything I want in life.
As I said earlier, I got bullied at school like any other young child. I felt that, when I read too much, I may put myself either behind or ahead of the classes that I attended, as I loved to learn and read about everything that I can get within my grasp. When you are different, you tend to think that the world is also against you in one way or another. Yet, it can be a frightening place. But if you can find some people that you can trust and rely on at that moment, everything will make sense, despite it being a scary place to be. Yes, like any other child, I did have so many questions that I felt needed to be asked and answered. Yet, I thought that it was alright just to hold myself from them. I did tend to have so many questions swimming inside my brain like a few fishes swimming in a clear river waiting to be caught by a fisherman. I felt while I was alone and being bullied sometimes, that it was good to try and stand up against these bullies and that was no exception for me when I was in high school. I was defending myself from a few people then. I wouldn’t call myself a bully nor a victim. I would call myself at that time, someone getting sick and tired of being picked on. Being different, trying to make sense of the world was hard enough for me. Trying to make sense of the world about what I was supposed to be and become in the near future.
Of all the pressures that were around me at the time, trying to fit in and trying to be popular or some other labels on me were hard enough. Little did I know while growing up that, having these labels wasn’t for me and that, it damaged my self-esteem and self-confidence. This will be the same for most girls and young woman growing up. No child should be bullied or become a victim to this and many more of indifferences that occur in the world today.
We need to know who and what we are today in our society, as what we are today can play an important part someone’s life. No matter what dreams, goals and aspirations that we’ve got, the giants will always attack us one way or another. Instead of saying to ourselves, “Why me?” Say “Challenge me.” To the bullies that come to us and bully us, try not show anger, bitterness or hate. Instead, do the opposite effect of the “Ripple Effect.” This Means; to show that you care and love the bullies. Yes, I’m hearing you all say; “Easier said than done.”
Yet, once you do start forgiving them, you’ll feel a lot better within yourself and have inner peace, inner strength and inner hope. You’ll also have inner peace about your past and present. You’ll then therefore, be ready for your future, or whatever it is that life will offer you.